Paying the Price to Lead

And Why it's Worth it

In June of 2018, I was gifted something special: a Bible, accompanied by a handwritten note from my pastor, celebrating the completion of my Doctorate. This gesture arrived just as I was about to embark on a significant chapter of my life—assuming the presidency at The King's University. Excitement and apprehension were my close companions. Could I truly rise to this challenge of being a president, and simultaneously a Senior Pastor? Was I the right person for this role? Was it even possible to do both?

However, the primary question rolling around in my mind was:

What sacrifices would this new journey demand from me?

The letter from Pastor Craig was profoundly touching, containing words meant just for me. However, one piece of advice he offered stands out, and I feel compelled to share it:

"Pay the price. Do it with joy. Quietly. Privately. Working. Pushing...delivering." - Craig Groeschel

Embarking on this ReLeader path, I knew it wouldn't be without its hardships. Those of you who have walked this road of leading understand the toll it can take. And for those considering it, it's essential to grasp what might be in front of you.

Below are just a few thoughts I share in my experiences of what leadership costs. At the bottom of the article, I would love for you to share some of yours in the comments section.

Here we go:

The Cost of Being Captain

Back in the day, when the helm wasn't mine to hold, I fancied myself quite the sage—armed with solutions for every problem, a navigator par excellence through the stormiest of seas. It's a common illusion, one that vanishes the moment you take your place in the captain's chair. Suddenly, you're not just navigating; you're steering the entire ship, and the weight of that responsibility is staggering.

Being the captain means your mind is a whirlwind of considerations, each more complex than the last. Every decision you make sends ripples through the waters, affecting not just the immediate course but the distant horizon as well. It's not merely about choosing left or right; it's about foreseeing the storms and calms ahead, understanding how each turn impacts the crew, the cargo, and the journey itself.

The variables are innumerable—people's livelihoods, the organization's budget, public engagement, the very culture you're cultivating within your community. These aren't just numbers on a page or names on a roster; they're the lifeblood of your mission, the souls aboard your ship, relying on your wisdom to guide them safely through uncharted waters.

This captaincy, while an honor, comes with its own price tag. It demands a blend of courage, foresight, and a steady hand, all the while maintaining the morale of your crew and the faith of those who trust in your leadership. The challenge is monumental, but so are the rewards of steering your ship to new horizons, and navigating through the minefields with a clear vision and a firm resolve.

Assuming the role of captain comes with its unique set of trade-offs. What might it cost you? Perhaps a few hours of sleep as your mind races with plans and responsibilities. It could mean moments where worries nudge aside your peace of mind. And sometimes, in the thick of leadership's demands, you might find yourself missing out on life's simple pleasures—like the leisure to enjoy a sunset fully.

The Cost of Conflict

Expect conflict on your journey to ReLead—it's as inevitable as the changing tides. In the process of mending what's broken, we often encounter resistance. Not everyone will recognize the flaws we aim to fix. Transforming detrimental habits into beneficial ones might be perceived as an assault rather than a necessary course correction. Making tough decisions can feel like navigating through a storm, with each choice potentially stirring waves of discontent.

In our crew, there will be those who, lacking the full scope of our vision, may question our direction and doubt our intentions. This discord stems from a gap in understanding—they're navigating without seeing the entire chart. Being misunderstood, especially without the chance to explain your course, is challenging. It's like steering through the fog, knowing your path but unable to make it visible to all.

Yet, it's within this turmoil that true leadership is forged. Conflict, while daunting, is not a signal to retreat but a call to engage more deeply. It invites us to lead with courage, to embrace the discord as a crucible for growth and transformation. By running towards the storm rather than away from it, we harness the power to shape a stronger, more resilient course. It's in these moments that we can truly steer our ship and its crew toward new horizons, crafting a legacy of bold leadership and unwavering commitment to our collective journey.

The Cost of Losing Friends

This was a reality I hadn't anticipated. Naively, I believed I could navigate this leadership voyage without causing ripples, retaining the affection and approval of all. Yet, leading an organization toward its necessary direction often means making choices that won't please everyone.

Acknowledging this reality didn’t give me permission to dismiss people’s opinions. Truth without grace is mean, and grace without truth is meaningless. Instead, it empowers me to make tough decisions with the knowledge that they serve the organization's greater good—and, ultimately, benefit everyone involved.

The Cost of Taking the High Road

In the early days, there was a bit of a stir among some church members. They couldn't wrap their heads around why the former lead pastor couldn't just step back into his old shoes. "Aren't we all about forgiveness?" was a common phrase. The decision, though, came from the Elders, not from me. I was just the ReLeader, but I was privy to all the gritty details—details that weren't suitable for public airing. The kind that, if everyone knew, would probably stop the questioning in its tracks. Sharing those secrets might have momentarily eased the pressure on me, but at what cost? Would it do justice to my predecessor? Would it align with our values of respect and not engaging in gossip?

It felt like having a loaded gun that I could not fire. Choosing the high road came with its own set of tolls. It cost me members of the congregation, and it influenced how some people saw me. But it was a testament to the value of walking with integrity, even when the path was anything but easy.

Is it worth it?

The sacrifices inherent in leadership—the sleepless nights, the constant concerns, the missed moments of simple joy—are not just costs but investments in something far greater. Steering this ship, we're not just navigating our course but altering the trajectories of those around us, shaping destinies in ways that ripple through the Kingdom of God.

This leadership journey, with all its demands, is fundamentally about making a lasting impact. It's about enduring the challenges with resilience, inspired by the purpose that transcends the immediate hardships. The real measure of our voyage isn't found in the calmness of the seas we traverse but in the strength and character we develop, and the positive change we foster in the lives of those we lead.

In the grand scheme, the sacrifices pale in comparison to the profound influence we can have on our world and the advancement of the Kingdom. Our leadership is a testament to our faith, a calling to serve and uplift, ensuring that despite the costs, the outcome—marked by growth, impact, and spiritual fulfillment—is unequivocally worth it.

These are just a few examples I thought of. What else does leading cost us? Second question, does it have to cost us that?